I met a woman in Mexico through an Airbnb tour, last year. We got to talking and ended up at a coffee shop. We talked for hours! She shared her life story & I shared mine.
She tells me that her birthday is the next day! She was by herself, as I was, so we decided to celebrate together. We bought her favorite cake, sat at a cafe where a Mexican duet was playing, ate, listened, laughed & yes, cried a little bit too. That was the last time I saw her, although we had intentions to reconnect.
She said 2 things to me that I still think about — not verbatim: (1) You know what you have to do? Turn off the TV, phones, books, all your distractions + ways of escape. Just sit in a room. Sit in that room until it is full of your own crap. It’s the hardest thing you’ll ever have to do. (2) It is good to see the good in everyone. But you have to remember that a flower is a flower and a scorpion is a scorpion. It is in the nature of a flower to bloom like it is in the nature of a scorpion to bite. Her words felt like a riddle. There was no “resolution” or “ending” in them. Only unquestionable truths. If I sat in a room with all my shit, then what? If I saw a flower or a scorpion, then what? Am I the flower? The scorpion? Neither? Both?
I realize now I wished she gave me answers. Meanwhile, I think that she was, maybe, trying to tell me to find my own. I am slowly, I hope, getting to a place of… not tolerance or passive acceptance — I don’t think I want those… What I wish is a place of wide-eyed awareness + strength + power. #Ha #BeCarefulWhatYouWishFor
I know & understand the joy, power + bliss of ignorance. I miss it so badly I ache for it. But l took the proverbial red pill (hint: Matrix reference) and it feels that there is no going back, only deeper. I’ve been studying + hearing/reading from seasoned teachers & analysts of the human condition. Ancient, past, and present, they all seem to say: More awareness is the way forward. It is part of the good solution. I damn well hope and pray that is true. 
Mental Health Awareness Month (in the US anyway) is May. I took the day off from work today (meaning I need to work tom, Sat 
) I really feel they should mandate 1 day this month, of individual’s choosing, as an official global holiday 
#MaybeItWillStimulateTheEconomy !
If you look at our society today, it feels we have a lot of individual + collective healing to do — maybe it starts with the belief systems + mindsets we value + uphold + reinforce. It is 2021 and there’s so much we have yet to understand about the brain and mental health. But we do have a sliver of awareness now. And it takes courage + patience + discernment to go deeper & move us forward. #Hardstuff
May you find a way this month to take care + understand your own mental health! (And if you have the capacity, of people in your circle). In how ever, way that feels right to you. (For me, writing and outside often helps! Researching concepts /ideas lol sometimes do too!)
Peace, peace, peace!
Happy Flyday Friday!
