Last May, we drove from Madrid to Bilbao and stopped by La Rioja for a night. It took about 4 hours to get there. We stayed in Fuenmayor, a small town close to a lot of vineyards which the La Rioja region is known for.
Our Airbnb host met us in an almost empty apartment complex. “I grew up here but you can see a lot of people has moved out. There are no jobs. I live in the next city now.”
One of the most fascinating part of our trip is traveling from a city to the countryside, and vice versa… The soul of a city vs the soul of a countryside. Urban vs rural. Amazingly different.
We all hear this from the polls — in any country — the urban areas lean towards a certain ideology often very different from the rural areas. Voting is often split. Laws and regulations are often contrasting.
In the past I didn’t get it — so focus I was in what I thought to be “right” or “good” that you lose sight of the fact that people’s way of life can be very different from each other — even if they are from the same “country” as you…
But traveling as we were, these last few months is giving me a whole new perspective.
When you’re in a city the energy is fast, electric, tense — it’s that energy that sizzles — tempting you to touch. It’s magnetic and you’re almost helpless not to go with that flow.
In the countryside… it’s not. It’s a subtle force, allowing you to slow down, to take a deep breath, to look around. The energy is quiet, still and in some ways, maybe, unsettling.
I found that Barcelona, New York, Istanbul and Manila have probably more in common than say, Barcelona to Fuenmayor, or New York to Bar Harbor, or Istanbul to Cappadocia, or Manila to Isabela. Cities all over the world can talk to each other and they’ll be speaking the same “language”— varying accents, probably. But a city to a countryside — it might sound like they are the same “language” but if you zoom out, they’re usually not…
And it makes sense. Look around — life in these 2 areas are often vastly different. And it’s human nature to be influenced by your surroundings and so it follows that what shapes a “city-person’s” perspective may vary greatly from someone who lives far away from that city.
Is someone wrong? Is someone right?
I dream of a world where my own brain and a lot of human brains will still feel validated even as someone thinks differently than I. A world where we can recognize a varying on perspective means listening versus arguing. A world where being “right” is not our major (and only) priority. I’m guilty of this too.
It’s hard because we are conditioned to want to be right. And yes, I believe, we are conditioned. At a very young age, when we go to school, good grades means having the correct answer and the correct answer is usually just one answer. A, B, C, or D.
D may be all of the above but answering A or B still means you’re wrong because D (all of the above) is “the” correct answer.
I remember when I was in 3rd grade, we were given a reading assignment — there were only 2 options and we have to pick one and answer why. I went home pretty confident of my answer AND absolutely sure everyone else have the same one. The next day, to my surprise, the class was split! What? How can this be? It was pretty obvious that the right answer was my answer!! Apparently not. I was so sad. What made it worse was my teacher said we were all correct! How is that even possible? Someone has to be right…
I remember that day so vividly because I remembered being very disappointed. In hindsight (of course, because for the longest time I thought my teacher was wrong — and some days lol I still think she was) — this is probably one of the most important thing I learned in elementary school.
I dream of a world where before we find and create solutions (especially laws and regulations) to problems, we take a step back, allow people to express themselves and openly listen. (Yes, it might be time-consuming but where has the alternative gotten us so far?)
There’s that quote that goes something like, “In order to understand a person, you have to climb in his shoes and walk in it.”
AND Walk in it.
UGH, SO HARD – because walking with someone else’s shoes is so uncomfortable. That’s the difference I think between knowledge and understanding. Putting on someone else’s shoes, knowledge. Walking in it, understanding.
I therefore conclude that there should be a policy where all city dwellers must try to live in the countryside for atleast a week/month. AND vice versa. ??
