I sit here.
Turning older another day, year.
I feel my heart. Thump, thump, thumping
My breath. Inhaling, exhaling
My blood. Flow, flow, flowing
Earth
Fire
Water
Air
Grounding
Passion
Change
Space
I’ve felt them
for better, for worse
inside, outside
everywhere, nowhere
I feel them
I am a Libra
The Scale
Like a pendulum swinging
Constantly yearning for
Balance
Sustainability
Harmony
Peace
In the middle
One eye left
One eye right
Backward
Forward
Constantly
Searching
Reflecting
Understanding
Connecting and Reconciling
It is what it is
I am what I am
Ah yes, me
Who am I?
I hold and let go
is who I am
All
in due time
All
in due season
For now
I sit here
Gratitude
Acceptance
Filling my heart
Expanding my lungs
Calming my mind
Enlightening my body
I have nothing
I have everything
And Oh,
Am I grateful!
Because
just this
just now
just here
Is enough.
So, I swim
in this space
time
matter
Floating in gratitude
Aware of the sinking
Aware that I may lose my breathing
I swim
through the waves of
shoulds and woulds
wishes and intentions
illusions and delusions
dreams and ambitions
questions and questions
I swim
And smile
Ah, to be alive!
Ah, to be breathing and moving!
full of complexity and simplicity
the ever-changing unchanging
I was born yesterday
but I guess, I’m kinda born every day
Swimming in this ocean, these waves
Floating in this water always in motion
Who knows what can and will happen?
I don’t.
And that is the sorrow and joy of the (not) possible
The blessing and curse of the (not) knowing
Yet, I swim
Slowly trusting this body
Slowly trusting this breathing
Slowly trusting this strength
I swim
Learning the way of the water
Learning the way of the ocean and its waves
Learning of containers and being contained
I remember how I used to sink
I remember how many times I almost drowned
And for a moment I feel the same sense of fear and panic
And for a moment I am brought back in space and time
I start to sink down down down
I start to kick and fight and tumble all around
Then I remember
The futility of the struggle
So I let go and surrender
Because I remember too
That the water may be rough and relentless
But it is not for me or against me
It just is
Who is for me then?
I wonder, talking out loud.
Only to realize
I am already at ease, already floating!
Again!
Then I hear an answer
“Life.”
Silence.
“Life is for you.”
Simply.
Quietly.
Just like
That.
Of course!
I remember.
I know.
(breathe)
Life is for me.
L’chaim ✨
THANK YOU for ALL your birthday LOVE ♥️
Cake by the Ocean
